And so the final team news of what has been a cluster fuck of a season for Forest landed. Still no Murilo. wtf was that Villa Europa semi all about? The dark recesses of the modern interweb has the rumour mill working overtime. It does sound like the Boy from Brazil is probably fit, and wanted to remain so before seeing what other options are out there ahead of the new contract signing.

Bournemouth are no mugs, They rocked up at the World Famous on a seventeen match unbeaten PL run. That’s quite some going. An unthinkable Champions League place was even within their grasp ahead of KO. Let’s sink them, along with their crappy Lego ground and embarrassing club badge.

Harry Hodge was on fine form on BBC Radio Nottingham ahead of KO:

“It’s been a good season and I’ve really enjoyed it.”

Blimey. Speak for yourself, fella.

KO came. My eyes were elsewhere. I had Forest on the telly, and then #lolspurs and West Ham across a couple of MacBooks. On the beach, on the settee, etc. The main action was elsewhere.

The tribute to Robbo just before KO was lovely. Forest may be a BONKERS club on and off the pitch, but they do seem to pull off these important occasions with class, showing the respect that is deserved for Robbo.

Out came the players, out came the kids. Awwww, isn’t it sweet? Erm… I’m sorry to sound all old school on you, but I can’t get my head around players' kids coming out for a bit of a family photo album moment ahead of KO. This is SERIOUS business. I do wish we could return to the old City Ground days of the away team running out first at 2:55pm, to be greeted with:

“WHO THE FUCKING HELL ARE YOU?”

The MGW chants started early. They were swiftly followed by the Trent End letting its collective voice air an opinion on Tuchel. Anderson aside, I have zero interest in what will be a crappy and increasingly corporate World Cup. Pre-season can’t come quick enough.

The game started at a killer pace. Both teams would struggle to keep this up under Mediterranean temperatures down on the banks of the Trent.

Cometh the hour, cometh MGW. UP YOURS, Tuchel, etc.

The second half was a little shaky for Forest. Bournemouth are a bloody good team. But we were on the beach, and tbh, I really didn’t give a shit. It was finally fun watching Forest after what has been a very painful season. The equaliser almost passed me by.

It was a smart move to sub Anderson after sixty minutes. It meant he was injury free ahead of the World Cup, which will only increase his price value. If he does miraculously decide to stay, then no doubt he will thank Forest for giving him a safe passage for what is to follow this summer.

Meanwhile, over in MacBook Land and #lolspurs were winning; likewise for West Ham. Imagine how bleak this could have been if we were still involved in a last day shoot out.

And so farewell season season four in the PL. Thank fuck that’s over. At least we didn’t get relegated wearing pinstripes again.

I felt a little sorry for Nuno, but only for a fleeting moment. If only he had kept his mouth shut back in August - which feels like an absolute age away.

A farewell to Anderson? Possibly. But we can cash in, and hopefully rebuild over the coming weeks, preferably starting ASAP. There’s a growing pile of deadwood that needs to go. My manta for the summer months is to not get sucked into the transfer hype machine that is FFTV.

A Forest hat-trick: a black T, a vest and a beanie. What am I suppose to do when the club drop an end of season 50% off sale? The black T is interesting. It’s knitwear, and not a straight forward T as I was expecting. I quite like it. Northern Soul vibes. The vest is purely for tattoo PONCEING. The beanie is a skate style that surprisingly suits my egghead. We came SO close to Three Stars on the Badge, Comrades.

And so Forest’s annual On the Beach day came around a little earlier this season. Two games to spare, with plenty of breathing space ahead of Bournemouth at home. What were we all so worried about?

The team news landed. MGW. Blimey. He’s stepped up big time this season following the #lolspurs fall out of last summer. He had no need to play this match with his mask. It’s clear that he still has a point to prove ahead of the World Cup.

Vitor meanwhile on BBC Radio Nottingham was living in fantasy land. Or maybe something got a little lost in translation?:

“We won the Champions League.”

Steady the buffers, gaffer.

He went on to clarify:

“We won our Champions League.”

Which is a rather chest-beating way of saying we’re not getting relegated, a new contract should be in the post, job well done.

VERY well done. I’ve never been so chilled watching a Forest match in recent seasons. If this is what mid-table obscurity feels like, then bring it on.

All we’ve ever really wanted in the four years since the PL return is to be safe by Easter, and then coast in as the sun starts to shine. Last season was an outlier.

There was strong end of season vibes ahead of KO. I can’t say I’m a fan of player’s kids coming out with the team. But then I haven’t got any kids, and I’m never likely to be leading Forest out at Old Trafford.

The game was wide open right from the KO. Man Utd struck first whilst the Forest players were rolling out the beach towels.

But wait! What’s this?

Morato? Where the chuff did that come from? Tie that BEAST of a bloke down with a ten year contract, erm, right…?

Man Utd went ahead again, before the sun tan lotion could be rubbed into the muscular thighs of the Brazilian BEAST. Whatever. It was that type of game.

The dodgy VAR - which is putting it politely - wasn’t really in the spirit of the end of term feel. It will do little to silence the growing sense of the PL Cartel, and accusations of being corrupt as fuck.

Cometh the hour, cometh the man in the mask. MGW’s second for Forest was the goal of the game. I was known to be a rather tricky player myself back in the day - there you go again, making a Forest Crap Match Report all about yourself, etc.

But the delicacy of the touch by MGW, and the skill and foresight requited to pull that off was incredible. Not only should he be on the plane to the WC, he should be starting alongside Anderson.

The game then went a little bonkers, with basketball breaks up and down the pitch. Either team could easily have scored a couple more.

It wasn’t to be for Forest. There’s no shame in a 3-2 defeat away at Old Trafford, including a very poor VAR decision against us. I would be fuming if we weren’t already ordering in the margaritas ahead of KO.

Bournemouth back at the World Famous next weekend promises to be the beach part to end all beach parties.

Blimey. Those injuries aren’t half building up for Forest - all at the arse end of the season as well. After the EUPHORIA of #lolspurs, Burnley, Sunderland and Chelsea, the mood ahead of Newcastle at home was a little more sombre. The Europa semi defeat only three days ago has changed the whole outlook amongst the fan base.

And that’s the central point here: In the timeframe where Forest have played three matches in seven days, DIRTY Leeds haven’t played at all. How can that be fair in a fight to the death relegation battle? The starting XI against Newcastle looked more like a pre-season team selection.

Some standout names need mentioning. This is the 50th appearance for Forest from Jesus this season. Christ, etc. We’re bloody working him hard. He deserves a decent summer break in order to recharge for next season.

KO came. The World Famous City Ground looked an absolute STUNNER under the early afternoon sun. Forest started fine. The Serbinator was aggressive, Bakwa is starting to bloom.

I’m no fan of in game formation changes. It’s not quite in the spirit of the game for your ‘keeper to go down with a mystery knock, only for the Coach to change the line up ahead of the restart. But it seemed to work for Forest, and kept Newcastle out.

Taiwo was looking strong. I’m still unsure about him for next season. He needs a run of half a dozen or so games to get going once again. But he’s unlikely to get that, especially so with no European football to look forward to.

Luka Netz meanwhile looks like a very positive option ahead of next season. I’d have no issues if he slotted into regular first team action. Not so Morato. Anyone who waves £15m at Forest should be taken up on the offer.

I confess to losing a little interest midway through the second half. I had a few household chores that couldn’t hold back. I pottered around with the telly pictures on, and the BBC Radio Nottingham commentary in my ears.

Newcastle scored. Arse. The defence was split wide open. But wait! What’s this? Anderson’s goal was great. It was a proper old school Harry Hodge midfielder’s goal, timing his run and momentum just right. It was quite emotional seeing his celebration.

A nervy couple of hours or so followed, watching West Ham and waiting to see if Arsenal would do us a favour. You have to feel for Nuno and his team. FUCK VAR, etc. But whatever. We’re safe and staying up. I couldn’t take the desperation of having to play out for a win against Bournemouth on the last day of the season.

To Europe! …for one final time, possibly. Who knows when this experience will come around again? Another thirty year wait? Or if we play our cards right, we can still finish 7th in the PL. Steady the buffers, etc.

You know how this plays out by now. The team news drops (whilst I was in the shower, actually, with Sir Colin of West Bridgford on the waterproof bluetooth speaker). Morato. Oh. I have a bad feeling about this. We do love our anti-heroes at Forest.

Villa Park was spectacular ahead of KO, rising to the occasion. I remember the last time I was there for a semi - West Ham in the FA Cup, April 1991. I don’t recall tifos, fireworks and Europa League anthems.

“Who the fucking hell are you?”

…as West Ham ran out.

Forest were under the cosh, right from the start. You don’t say. In my mind, I resolved that we would be 1-0 down heading into the break. My hope was that we could SHIT HOUSE it out, and hang on for extra time and pens.

Our passing game was strangled by Villa in midfield. We missed MGW big time. Gaps appeared all over the midfield. McAtee is a very lightweight figure.

The volume at Villa Park only grew louder with the inevitable goal. I’m not digging out the Forest fans, but I couldn’t hear them throughout the 90 minutes on the telly. The atmosphere was very different to Villa Vs #lolspurs last Sunday.

We did well to hang on to HT with only the one goal against us. Time to regroup, time to urgently find a Plan B. Cometh the hour, cometh, erm, Ryan Yates. It would be quite some story if the Forest Academy player could lead us towards a major European final.

I’ve watched all our Europa League games this season totally stress free. The PL has been intense and horrid; the Europa is a nice jolly of a distraction. This kinda continued as the second, third and then fourth Villa goal went in.

Oh dear. This is not happening, right?

It’s been a messy, joyous and utterly BONKERS season for Forest. And there’s possibly still more to come. Farewell Europe - for now. We still need to put in a performance against Newcastle on Sunday to guarantee PL survival.

No one wants to be leading the charge of: To D***y! …next season.

These Forest Crap Match Reports come round quicker than another SHIT THE BED moment for the Reds. Monday afternoon in West London was no different. A 3-1 away win against the World Club Champions, with the Forest B team playing? I didn’t see that one coming. Does this now make Forest the current World Club Champions? Steady the buffers.

The team news landed. DEEP breath. Blimey. Talk about calling Emery’s bluff. The Garibaldi conspiracy theory of Villa forcing Forest to play their A team ahead of the Europa semi, after ‘allowing’ #lolspurs to win on Sunday, backfired big time. Pereira called Emery’s bluff. Anything you can do, I can do better. And that includes starting with the stiffs.

Calling Taiwo a stiff is a little unfair. He made his 100th appearance for Forest at one of his favourite hunting grounds for goals. Surely he couldn’t, could he? Erm… I hadn’t even settled with the BBC Radio Nottingham audio sync with the telly pictures as Big T celebrated. Expect Chelsea to bid £40m for him over the summer.

A second soon followed, after Taiwo was pulled from behind in the box and a penalty was awarded. I didn’t mind who took it, but it would have been ACE to see T smash it home. JESUS, etc. It wasn’t quite the same TWATTING of a Chris Wood pen, but they all count.

This then became an exhausting watch. The endless VAR reviews - surprisingly going our way - and injuries made this a very, very nervy watch, despite Forest never really being in any danger. The third goal for the Reds was another T special, after some impressive work down the wing from MGW. A man can have no greater love than 90 minutes and his friends, etc.

SHOUT OUT to, oh, where to start? I can’t believe that I’m saying this, but there was some genuine 10/10 performances from the likes of Morato, Netz and Bakwa. All the fringe players could yet to prove their worth during the final run in as we chase European glory, balanced with PL survival.

And so with five wins in a row, and ten unbeaten, one half of the above could be completed next weekend. A win for Forest against Newcastle should keep us safe. Failing that and a West Ham defeat in the later Super Sunday KO away at Arsenal will get us over the line. We’re SO close…

Chelsea were crap btw. Nasty club, nasty fans. So there.

There’s a fantastic Forest conspiracy theory doing the rounds right now as we reach the PL / Europa run-in. It goes along the lines of Emery picking a weakened side for Villa against #lolspurs, with little interest in winning that match.

The logic is that a Spurs win on Sunday would motivate the need for Forest to beat Chelsea away on Monday. We’d have to play the A team, and not the stiffs and summer transfer rejects. This in turn would tire us out ahead of the second leg of the Europa semi against Villa on Thursday.

I’m starting to believe in conspiracy theories. The Villa 2-0 home defeat against #lolspurs was the worst ‘professional’ football performance that I’ve ever seen. I use to quite like Villa. All respect for the club has been lost overnight.

Tinfoil hats will be worn at The Bridge later today.

The team news drops. Morato. Oh dear. And so here we are, playing our first major European semi-final in 42 years - which still sounds utterly BONKERS to say - with the third choice centre half propping up the defence. Erm, is Chetts still match fit? He’d be guaranteed an unlikely European goal, right?

Elsewhere and Matty Cash returned to the World Famous, wearing the claret and blue of Villa. I wonder how he must have felt, having spent eight years at the club in the Championship years, and then returns to play on the European stage?

And what of Omari Hutchinson? Remember he was binned out of the original Europa League squad in a final act of bitterness by Nuno as part of his tit for tat with Edu. And yet here was Hutchinson, starting for Forest in a European semi-final. His selection was well-deserved, as well.

There was a fantastic atmosphere ahead of KO. Forza had done the old ground proud once more. You can watch in awe at how some of the major European power houses handle a European night with all the pre-match razzmatazz. But the World Famous City Ground doesn’t lend itself to flashing lights and stadium stretching tifos. It’s all about the fans, innit.

The game itself was something of a tense watch for me. I admit that BOOZE got the better of me, plus also a very poorly timed personal phone call that I had to take midway through the first half. Whoops.

MGW was nullified by Villa playing in his hybrid No.10 out wide role. Anderson was immense, as ever. Morato managed not to fuck it up. My main hope was for Forest to remain in the tie ahead of the second leg. Please don’t collapse with a humiliating scoreline against what is a very, very decent Villa team.

I needn’t have worried. The plan from Vitor appeared to be sit tight, hold your nerve, and take your chances if and when they come. Chris Wood certainly did that. There was only one way that pen was going to be taken it. Just bloody TWAT it. Blimey. We’re only 1-0 up in a European semi-final.

Cometh the hour, cometh the Academy boys. I was actually quite emotional when Ryan Yates, and then Zach Abbott both took to the field to shore things up. Neither player let the club down.

And so we take a 1-0 lead away to Villa Park for the return leg next week. I hope anybody’s not stupid enough to write us off, etc.

Woh. Where to start with this one? We were led to believe before KO that Sunderland’s Dutch ‘keeper Roefs was half decent. He wasn’t. Forest were relentless in the first half, and then shut up shop in the second. Jame Redknapp described this as “the performance of the season” over on Sky. For once I agree with what some of the mainstream talking heads come out with.

I lost track of the first half goals tbh. I tried to track them and keep pace with my BOOZE. Points, first pints later, yeah? But at 4-0 up at HT, there was never any real danger that Forest would mess up. It was more likely that my own BOOZE situation might create a little mess.

Finally we seem to have mastered the art of set pieces. It’s only taken four years in the PL to work this one out. MGW was magnificent once again. I can’t see how he can continue to be ignored when it comes to the World Cup squad selection.

The fifth and final goal for Anderson was a special moment. The Geordie boy scoring against Sunderland probably meant all the more to him than it did to the Forest fans. It was a touching moment after what has been tough personal patch for him.

You know something special is happening when the telly cameras focus in on the scoreboard in the ground, with 5-0 illuminated in bright LED. It’s a symbolic image of what has been achieved, without the expectation of such a battering. There’s an incredible stat that 20% of Forest’s PL goals this season have been scored in the past two matches. Yep, it’s been that kinda season.

Are we safe from relegation? The brains behind the OPTA super computer thingy seem to think so. Never trust an algorithm, Comrades. A lot will depend on the #lolspurs and West Ham results later this weekend. I can’t see either of them catching us if they fail to pick up three points. All focus can then turn towards Europe.

And so farewell Leicester City. Piss off back to the old Third Division where you belong. Harsh? Yep. But you try living for a year or so in the City of Death and not coming out of the whole experience feeling slightly unhinged.

Leicester are a club that deserves to be relegated. Careful what you wish for, etc. At the end of the we always win, and all that. But the club itself has been a disgrace over the past three seasons or so.

I admit to being caught up in the PL winning love in team of a decade ago. You always like to see the underdog win. The 2015/16 team was a side that you couldn’t but help admire. Come back and have a conversation when you have won two European Cups though.

Since winning the FA Cup five years later, the club has had a shocker, on and off the pitch. Some pretty tragic personal circumstances didn’t help. But that’s no excuse for the mismanagement that followed.

The way the fans and players treated Steve Cooper was poor. It may not have been the wisest decision by Cooper to head off down the Fosse. But posing for photos with signs saying they miss their old manager wasn’t a classy look.

Then there was the PL PSR dodge. Suck it up, fellas. Forest had to in the PL. We managed to overcome this and survive. Some creative accountancy at Leicester allowed them to carry it down to the Championship.

The relegation from the Championship to the third tier is all the more sweeter, knowing that the delayed points deduction has pretty much finished them off.

And do farewell Leicester City. Shame about the Derby play-off push as well.