To the Table of Dreams! …on Thursday afternoon. We did umm and ahh about whether a game of wiff waff in extreme heat was a wise idea. In the end you have to just get off yer arse and bloody do it, yeah?

The park seemed remarkably quiet. I know it’s the holiday season but still.

There was a gathering of a couple of young families playing boules on the newly installed Town council surface. This was rather reassuring to see.

Back on the wiff waff table and we opted for the non-wind ball. It felt like we had to give it an extra smash just to get it over the non-net net.

After twatting around a little with our warm-up going corner to corner, we entered into the game. As ever, I started off brightly but then lost heart. I really couldn’t be bothered.

At one stage it got so ridiculous that I took some steps back and delivered my killer spin serve from about three metres away from the table. It worked once but not the second or third time. Oh dear.

I walked away, not in shame, but still with a 4-1 defeat.