Crap Match Report: Brentford 0, Forest 2

I honestly didn’t give a shit about this game after the disaster away in Braga on Thursday. My usual pre-match preparations of endless Forest podcast listening, and tuning into BBC Radio Nottingham ahead of KO, were AWOL. I had no nerves, no expectations. If the team can’t be bothered, then neither can I.

The team news landed - I think. I didn’t even give it a shifty until 15 minutes before KO. No surprises to see that it was the exact same starting eleven that battled so well for the point at home to Arsenal. It’s no secret that Forest have a core of eleven or twelve players that are trusted, whilst the rest can be written off as a summer transfer window that went very wrong.

With no Luiz even on the bench, it looks like the Bearded One has played his last game in the Garibaldi. I would hesitate to say GOOD. But we haven’t exactly seen the superstar Luiz that was billed back in those optimistic days of September. Any Forest player that gets the City Ground light show as part of the signing announcement tends to flop.

Sir Colin of West Bridgford played out the highlights of the 3-1 reverse fixture under Nuno at the start of the season. The world was a very different place back then. Forest were on course for another generation defining season, whilst the Brentford PE teacher Coach was odds for the Sack Race.

I stuck with the BBC commentary and muted the telly. Sir Colin and Perchy were in stitches when the Only Fools and Horses theme was played out over the Gtech speakers. The last time I checked, the TW8 postcode ain’t in Peckham, Bruv.

Forest started superbly. SHIT THE BED. The control and then volley from Jesus was spectacular. If this has been scored by a Cartel 6 club then it would be a shoe in for Goal of the Season. Who needs new strikers, anyway?

This team is infuriating to watch. From the ‘what the fucking hell was that’ in Braga, and then fantasy football away in bloody Brentford only three days later. Is it Morato time yet?

The second half was always going to be ugly. We had to play Nuno Ball, minus the spring of the attack. Elanga would have run riot through a static Brentford back line.

DEFEND! DEFEND!

DEFEND! DEFEND! DEFEND!

And then my own highlight of the season to date dropped.

OH TAIWO. Give that man a ten year contract. This was the Taiwo of old, bullying the defence and using his muscle to bulldoze his way through to the goal. The final shot was half decent as well.

We all know that the old Taiwo won’t come back, but this could add another £5m to his price tag during the last week of the window. If it’s a sign off for Forest, then what a way to say farewell.

The two goal cushion made for a comfortable final ten minutes or so. It was good to silence Brentford and their crappy Hey Jude celebrations come full time. I’ll take Brentford over Braga, any day.